After 9 months of development and several rigorous sprints, the Rosa Family has a new launch to share.
Today we're proud to introduce:
John McKeon Rosa
8 lbs, 11 oz · March 6, 2026
- Shipping above projections.
- Immediately disruptive.
- Not yet taking meetings.
Strong early investor interest from grandparents.
A few early learnings from the first 24 hours:
- Returns are immediate and wildly non-linear
- Sleep appears to have been deprecated in this release
- The emotional override protocol is real and I was not prepared
- Hair was not on the roadmap. It shipped anyway. No complaints
- Current go-to-market strategy consists primarily of crying
None of this would have been possible without my co-founder, Elle Rosa, who — when asked to provide a quote for this announcement — said:
“I cannot believe you are writing a LinkedIn post about this.”
She has since been included in the announcement.
John is currently pre-revenue, operating in stealth, and declining all inbound at this time.
But he is here.
And he is extraordinary.
We're excited about the roadmap ahead.
Onward.